“A theology that states personhood and the self, dissolve as memory fades is a theology controlled by biological and neurological categories, not merely informed by them.”
“Dementia” Living in the Memories of God by John Swinton
What if
After 2000 years
Of this long haul of persecution
We have arrived at this nightmarish landscape
Of celestial silence.
No communication,
(Well at least no prophecy, visions, deus ex machina events
Revelations, portents)
Despite the ongoing daily prayers and tears of multitudes
Thronging to worship centers, the Kotel, Uman, 770, shuls and shtiebls.
Praying to our Old Testament God as always
Hopeful for the Messiah to be sent shortly.
What if,
Our divine image/imagining has faded
Our sense of His presence is blurred at the edges,
Our connection is marred by noise?
And, If Herr Rabiner Dr. Freud is correct
What if
Our Fatherly projection of God
Has followed its earthly model?
Watching our fathers in decline
Whether it be short term memory loss
Confusional episodes
Agitations or
Sudden bursts of rage
And the like.
What if
Our Divine Father
Has (kivyachol, of course)
Anthropomorphically speaking (of course)
With the greatest respect due (of course)
Entered a similar aging process (God forbid)
And our earthly projections of
Longer lifespans which have recently un-covered the decaying brain
The tangles and plaques of amyloid infiltrating the cells of the grey matter
The slow atrophy of the cerebral hemispheres,
Alzheimer’s, pre-senile dementias,
These too, surely,
Must accurately reflect themselves in the projected image
of the Divine Father (chas veshalom).
Which might explain His absence recently
During, say, our own Holocaust, or in Hiroshima,
Pol Pot massacres of 2 million, Bosnia and, as we speak, Aleppo.
Now I must qualify this heresy, this holy Apikorsus,
By saying that my description has nothing
Absolutely nothing
To do with the “real Divine”
Who, our philosophers claim
Remains perfect, without blemish or character flaw,
Unchanging and unmoved, perfect and with foreknowledge,
The Maimonidean “Prime Mover” or “First Thought” etc.
The God of the Jewish philosophers down to Hermann Cohen.
Rather I am moving along a slightly different trajectory
Of midrashic and mythic valence.
Whereby a living relationship between creator and creature
Has existed in covenant, in a dynamic interaction,
Where the actions and thoughts of one, influences the other,
Where emotions of one affect the other
And the behavior of either affects the relationship.
This very anthropopathic connection has even leaked into our liturgy
Which proclaims a loving connection between God and His creatures,
And a neediness for God to hear our prayers.
“God desires the suffering of his righteous ones”
and sends them pain and illness to try
What is there to explain a fracture in such a relationship
Where deep trust issue have arisen
Where the silence from above is deafening
And the sense of betrayal is palpable (as in Psalm 22)
ב אֵלִּי אֵלִּי, לָמָה עֲזַבְתָנִּי; רָחוֹק
מִּישוּעָתִּי, דִּבְרֵי שַאֲגָתִּי.
2 My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me,
and art far from my help at the words of my cry?
ג אֱלֹהַי--אֶקְרָא יוֹמָם, וְלאֹ
תַעֲנֶה; וְלַיְלָה, וְלאֹ-דֻמִּיָה לִּי.
3 O my God, I call by day, but Thou answer not;
and at night, and there is no surcease for me.
So many have tried
From Berkowitz and Soloveitchik to Rubinstein and Wiesel,
Only to leave me frustrated with words
And numb in the heart.
Maybe just maybe
We are dealing with a Divine Father in decline
Or worse a case of Divine dementia?
His absence from Auschwitz was not then intended
His silence from Hiroshima was not then malicious
His lack of response to evil was not a hester panim.
We then have no need to resort to medieval Jewish philosophy
Or question Divine justice,
We avoid the classic philosophical problems of evil and theodicy
Which remain unanswered after millennia.
Shlomo was on track by suggesting the problem was not in us,
Not our fault,
Not, chas veshalom in Klal Yisroel
(An unbearable burden, some Gedolim might have us bear)
maybe he mused
the fault was in the holy Torah!
The Torah had somehow failed us
We needed a new Torah
The Torah of the Messiah
This, however, still allows the Divine off the hook
And allows for a million and a half babies to go up in smoke
Collectively
For some thought some reason some rationale
And that is even more unbearable.
No, No, we must once again take the horrific step
A step that might lose us our olam habaah
A hermeneutical move so dangerous we might lose our sanity
But so be it
As we struggle for meaning NOT rationality.
So returning to our medical model
Of decline,
We all see this in our own earthly fathers surely
Watching them slowly deteriorate
Slowly narrow their focus
The visual acuity of their perspective narrows
The perception of their world blurs
Their judgment on life becomes crustaceous.
The Confusional episodes slowly grow in number and concern…
Yet we, as children, remain devoted
And tolerant of their slow decline
Despite the memory lapses
Despite the perseverations and anomias
And even the emotional outbursts
And frustrations
Even the occasional moments of self-awareness of decline.
So why not accept the same for the Heavenly Father (chas veshalom)
Who has secluded Himself in isolation,
Fearful (kivyachol) to go outside for embarrassment
Silently holed up in His study
Looking at the family photo album
Leafing through the Biblical pages
Of stories and battles long gone
Of heroes and prophets
Like an old VFW soldier.
Compassion for the Heavenly Father
Requires much patience and endurance
Just like down here on earth we patiently attend to our parents
“Long suffering and forbearance, slow to anger and mostly compassionate”
