Ketubot 79: Fetal Abduction וְלַד הַגּוֹנֵב

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The general rule regarding nikhsei melug, or usufruct property (legal term meaning the right to the fruits of another’s property, without damage or destruction of that property), is that the property remains in the woman’s possession, but her husband is okhel peirot – literally, he “eats the fruit.” 

In other words, she owns the property, but as long as they are married the profits accrued by the property belong to the husband.    

The Gemara asks, if one steals the offspring of an animal of a woman’s usufruct property must pay payment of double the principal to the woman.

Apparently this ruling is based on the assumption that the offspring is not treated as the produce of her property but as the principal, which belongs to the woman.

We explore the history of fetal burial practices as well as modern versions of the status of children in the UK as well as state sponsored fetal abduction in China.

Ketubot 78: Shame אָנוּ בּוֹשִׁים

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If a woman came into the possession of property before she was betrothed, Bet Shammai and Bet Hillel agree that she may sell it or give it away and her act is legally valid.

Rabbi Yehuda said that the Sages said before Rabban Gamliel: 

Since he acquired the woman herself through betrothal, will he not acquire the property from the moment of their betrothal? 

Why, then, is her transaction valid? 

Rabban Gamliel said to them: With regard to the new property that she inherited after marriage, we are ashamed, because it is unclear why she cannot sell it, as it is hers; and you also seek to impose upon us a prohibition with regard to the old property that she owned beforehand?
The Gemara wonders who has rights to this property.  Exactly when is she given the property?  Perhaps the timing of her acquisition will determine the status of his acquisition.  If they are betrothed, should he be allowed to access her property?   

We explore the notion of shame….both in historical terms and psychologically (freudian theory) and  in terms of toxic shame for those with addiction

ending with a Kabalistic essay on its usefulness in spiritual practice.  

Ketubot 77: πολύποδας

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This mishnah lists defects in a husband (either physical defects or ones related to his profession) that allow the woman to demand a divorce and receive her ketubah. 

These are the ones who are forced to divorce [their wives]: one who is afflicted with boils, one who has a polypus, a gatherer [of dog feces for the treatment of hides], a coppersmith or a tanner whether they were [in such a condition] before they married or whether they arose after they had married.

The wife of any husband who has one of the below-listed defects can demand a divorce, whether or not he had them before he was married.

We explore the history of polyps in antiquity from Galen to the medieval period.

Ketubot 76: Polydactyly

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The rabbis discuss courses of action when a husband discovers this blemish. One example is a husband who finds that his wife has an extra toe. Should he not have examined her for such a blemish before engaging in intercourse with her?

And how could she have 'grown' an extra toe after the betrothal?

Does her father have proof that the groom accepted the extra toe?

Or was this part of the body hidden and not known or at least not discussed?

We explore the syndrome of polydactyly and its ancient description in culture and texts.

Ketubot 75: Cosmetic Reasons for Divorce

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The rabbis are discussing blemishes: if a woman discloses that she has a blemish and the man accepts that blemish before the betrothal and/or before the marriage, he cannot claim later that the blemish is cause for divorce.  But what is a blemish?  

The rabbis discuss blemishes of women's bodies: moles on the face, moles with hairs, and low speaking voices. 

We explore moles and their consequences,  as well as the halachic controversy surrounding cosmetic surgery.

Ketubot 74: אֵצֶל רוֹפֵא וְרִיפֵּא אוֹתָהּ

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The Mishna (72b) offered two cases where a husband stipulates a condition before marriage. In one, he makes the marriage conditional on the fact that his wife has not taken vows upon herself; in the other his condition is that she does not have any blemishes.

The baraita brought by the Gemara on our daf discusses a woman who accepted these conditions and following the kiddushin goes to the Sage to have her vows rescinded or to a doctor to have her blemish healed. In such cases, the condition will be considered to have been fulfilled when the vows were removed by the Sage, but not when the blemish was healed by the doctor.

the Gemara explains that the Sage voids the vow retroactively, and we discover that at the moment of marriage the wife really was unburdened by vows. In the case of the doctor, however, the blemish was only healed from the time that the medical procedure was performed, so at the moment that the kiddushin was to take effect, the condition was not fulfilled.

we explore the status of physicians and healing and they relative weight in deciding halachic conflicts.

Ketubot 73: בְּעִילָתוֹ בְּעִילַת זְנוּת Civil Marriage

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Today, conditional marriages are discouraged, if not entirely disallowed. The Mishna (72b), however, discusses cases where a person made the marriage conditional on the fact that his wife does not have vows that she has taken on herself or physical deformities. In such cases, if the woman is found to have such vows or physical deformities there is no need for a divorce, since the condition upon which the marriage was based was not fulfilled.

If, for example, the husband marries her with stipulations regarding preexisting vows, the couple can be divorced. Of course it is understood that a man would not engage in licentious sexual intercourse knowingly.

In other words, he would not engage in intercourse with his wife if he knew that she had made a vow that forbade their intimacy.

We explore the halacha of civil unions in galut and in Israel.

We also visit the history of civil unions following the French Revolution as well as the tragic consequences of the Nuremberg laws for civil unions.

Ketubot 72: דָּת מֹשֶׁה vs וִיהוּדִית

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The Mishna on our daf lists situations where a woman can be divorced without receiving her ketuba.

These include a woman who transgresses “the law of Moses” or “Jewish practice.”

According to the Mishna, transgressing the “law of Moses” includes:

• feeding her husband untithed food,

• engaging in relations while she is a niddah (during the period of her menstruation)

• not setting apart her dough offering,

• making vows and not fulfilling them.

According to the Mishna, transgressing the “law of Moses” includes:

• going out with an uncovered head,

• spinning wool in the street,

• conversing with every man.

We explore the history of women’s head covering form a halachic and cultural perspective.

Ketubot 71: "Like Towers"

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A new Mishna looks at husbands who vow unreasonably, according to the rabbis.

If husbands vow that their wives cannot visit their families or that they cannot visit houses of mourning, they must divorce their wives within specific time frames.

Likewise, if they have their wives perform chores that are then ridiculed (filling a bucket of water and then throwing it into the garbage), they are to divorce.

Rabbi Yochanan comments on two verses (song 10:8 and Hosea 2:18) to underscore the motivation behind the wife’s eagerness to return to her home. His interpretation is in line with the long tradition of non-literal interpretation of the erotic love poetry in Song of Songs.

We explore the traditions of interpretation of the Song of Songs from the literal to the midrashic and literary.

Ketubot 70: Power Boundaries

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The ketuba is a central part of the marriage agreement that exists between husband and wife. 

Thus, any agreement that the couple makes between themselves that does not contradict the Torah should be valid. 

Nevertheless, there are situations where either spouse may violate the marriage agreement to such an extent that the courts will insist that the marriage be undone.

 In such cases, it is the individual who is perceived to be at fault who is punished. 

We explore the quality of marriage in different traditions and power and boundaries in the haredi marriages.

Ketubot 69: בְּאִיסְקַרְיָא דְּמָכוּתָא Tied To The Mast

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Our Gemara relates an unusual story about Ilfa, one of the first generation amoraim in the Land of Israel. Ilfa attached himself to a ship’s mast and announced that if anyone presented him with a teaching that appeared in the baraitot of Rabbi Ḥiyya and Rabbi Oshaya, he would show a source from the Mishna from which this teaching could be understood (i.e. that all of the traditions that appeared in the baraita were included in the Mishna). 

Furthermore, he said if he was unable to do so he would throw himself into the sea. 

The Gemara relates that there were those who took Ilfa up on his challenge, and that he was able to successfully respond to those challenges.

We examine the history of seafaring in antiquity and the interaction of the myth of Ulysses and the rabbinic tradition and its use in modern Hebrew literature.

Ketubot 68: Dishonest Paupers

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On our daf  we are told that we really ought to appreciate false solicitors of charity. 

Were it not for them, we would be held accountable for turning away any person in serious need. 

Since there are some rogues who do prey on the well-intentioned, we are no longer duty-bound to assume that everyone we meet who asks for our assistance is actually in desperate need. 

We explore the limits of charitable giving , the halachic ramifications, and Greg Gardner's review of poverty in Early rabbinic Judaism.

Ketubot 67: Giving Silently נוֹחַ לוֹ לָאָדָם שֶׁיִּמְסוֹר עַצְמוֹ לְתוֹךְ כִּבְשַׁן הָאֵשׁ, וְאַל יַלְבִּין פְּנֵי חֲבֵרוֹ בָּרַבִּים

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We all know that it is a mitzva to give charity. According to Jewish law, the ideal would be to offer support to others anonymously, particularly when it might be embarrassing to know who the giver is.

We learn about Mar Ukva, who gave money in many ways.  One of his recipients wanted to know who was leaving money by his door each day, and so he waited and watched.  

That day, Mar Ukva's wife accompanied him and gave the tzadaka.  As the recipient hear the door move, he jumped out to see who was there, but Mar Ukva and his wife ran into a furnace room where his legs were burned but hers were not.  He realized that she was more worthy and became upset.  She calmed him down by explaining that I usually give tzedaka from the home - food and useful items - and you give money, which is less immediately useful.  That is why my tzedaka is greater.  The rabbis teach that It is better to put oneself in a firey furnace than to whiten the face of a friend [to embarrass a friend].   Tamar taught us this when she stepped up to be burnt and she named her father-in-law without saying his actual name and embarrassing him.  

We explore the hierarchy of giving Tzedakah based on the RAMBAM as we struggle between the levels of giving and not embarrassing the poor.

We encounter the curious whitewashing of Jewish gangsters in the late 20th century US, because of their propensity for charity.

Ketubot 66: בַּת נַקְדִּימוֹן בֶּן גּוּרְיוֹן

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Steinsaltz informs us that the sixth perek of Massekhet Ketubot focuses on the nedunya – the dowry that a woman brings into her marriage. This nedunya is not a biblical obligation and is not considered a required part of the marriage agreement. Nevertheless, over time traditions developed that were given legal sanction by the Sages of the Mishnah.

Rav Yehuda quotes Rav as telling the story of Nakdimon ben Guryon’s daughter, who was allotted 400 gold pieces for her daily perfumes.

Nakdimon ben Guryon was one of the wealthiest residents of Jerusalem during the period of the destruction of the Second Temple. The Gemara in Massekhet Ta’anit (20a) tells of his generosity and concern for the Jewish people, as well as the miracle that happened to him to repay his debts.

His great wealth is mentioned a number of times in the Talmud. The Gemara in Gittin relates that he and two other wealthy people accepted upon themselves the responsibility to support the city of Jerusalem for the duration of the Roman siege around the city, and that with his wealth could have succeeded in doing so for 20 years. 

Nevertheless it appears that during the civil war that broke out in the city, his storehouses were destroyed, and he was left destitute. This explains the continuation of our Gemara in which the daughter who mocked the allotment of perfume that she received eventually turns to Rabban Yohanan ben Zakkai to beg for support.

Ketubot 65: מְצִיאַת הָאִשָּׁה וּמַעֲשֵׂה יָדֶיהָ

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Our Mishna discusses the case of someone who leaves his wife and appoints someone to make

sure that she has all of her needs as delineated by the ketuba.

The Mishna lists the basic

requirements that must be supplied in such a case: food, furnishings, clothing and so on.

The conclusion of both our Gemara and the Yerushalmi appears to be that wealthy women were given an allotment of wine for both drinking and cooking, if that was their common practice.

We explore the history of entrepreneur Jewish women from antiquity to the present, including how Jewish widows controlled their assets, how they negotiated both their contractual relationship to their husbands as well as the outside prejudicial men’s world of commerce.

Ketubot 64: הַמּוֹרֶדֶת עַל בַּעְלָהּ

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The Mishnah on 63b states:  A woman who rebels against her husband (moredes) is fined; her marriage contract is reduced by seven dinars each week. Rabbi Yehuda says: Seven half-dinars [terapa’ikin] each week. Until when does he reduce her marriage contract? Until the reductions are equivalent to her marriage contract, i.e., until he no longer owes her any money, at which point he divorces her without any payment. 

The Gemara first considers rebellion as a refusal to participate in conjugal relations.  For men who refuse their wives, that woman is permitted to divorce him, for he has not met the requirements of their marriage contract.  When a woman refuses intercourse, she may lose her ketubah.  The rabbis discuss the significance of conjugal relations compared with the ability to perform tasks.  A woman might be ill or menstruating.  When is she deemed a rebellious woman?   a “moredet”

We explore the (asymmetric) legal status of the moredet as well as early talmudic roots for the halachah, ending with a comparison with Qumran laws of the rebellious wife.

Ketubot 63: שֶׁלִּי וְשֶׁלָּכֶם — שֶׁלָּהּ הוּא

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Rachel was the daughter of Ben Kalba Savua, who came from one of the wealthiest and most politically powerful families in Israel during the time of the destruction of the Second Temple. Akiva, a 40-year-old shepherd who worked for Ben Kalba Savua, asked Rachel to marry him. She agreed to do so if he promised to devote himself to the study of Torah after their wedding. Akiva agreed to do so, and they secretly married.

Upon learning of this Ben Kalba Savua threw Rachel out of his house and disowned her, condemning her to a life of poverty while Akiva studied. The Talmud relates that after 12 years of study, Akiva returned with 12,000 students, but before entering his house he heard his wife say that she would be willing to have her husband continue to learn for another 12 years. Taking her on her word, he returned to the beit midrash for another 12 years, returning home this time with 24,000 students.

We explore the legend and the story and how it was used to inspire the love of Torah scholarship as well as the role of women in supporting their husband’s vocations.

Ketubot 62: What a Woman Wants רוֹצָה אִשָּׁה בְּקַב וְתִיפְלוּת מֵעֲשָׂרָה קַבִּין וּפְרִישׁוּת

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The Mishna discusses the frequency with which such relations are required and concludes that depending on the husband’s job – which determines how often he is home – there are greater or lesser expectations.

Thus, an unemployed man may be expected to sleep with his wife every night, while a sailor is only obligated to do so once every six months.

Our Gemara discusses the obligation of married talmidei hakhamim – individuals who have dedicated themselves to the study of Torah.

Rav Yehuda quotes Shmuel as ruling that talmidei hakhamim are obligated to have marital relations every Friday night.

We examine the conflict between studying Torah vs family responsibility as well as the etymology of the term Onah from Ex 21:10 through its interpreters Ibn Ezra and RADAK.

We end with the current gendered discourse in Israeli religious and secular society and Judith Hauptman’s revision of women’s role in the talmud narratives.

Ketubot 61: עונה

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This mishnah teaches that a husband has an obligation to have sexual relations with his wife.

How frequently he is obligated depends on his job.

The idea that a husband has an obligation to periodically have relations with his wife is derived from Exodus 21:10 which states that if a man takes a second wife he cannot diminish from her three things: food, clothing or conjugal rights.

A man cannot make a vow to forbid upon his wife anything which he is mandated to give her by law.

The man in this mishnah, perhaps in a fit of anger, forbade his wife from have sexual relations with him.

This is not permitted and if he does not have his vow annulled

We review the Mitzvah on onah and the asymmetry of obligation between the man and the woman.

Finally some recent literature on religion and sexuality ending with some confessional writing.

Ketubot 60: Milk of Kindness

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The Mishna (59b) teaches that one of the obligations that a wife has to her husband is to nurse his newborn child.

This is a responsibility that exists even after her husband dies.

According to the baraita brought by our Gemara, should her husband pass away while she is nursing, the widow cannot marry for a year and a half (Rabbi Yehuda) or two years (Rabbi Meir) lest she become pregnant and lose her ability to produce milk.

Women are encouraged to nurse their children until the children are at least 24 months and not significantly beyond four or five years.

The rabbis discuss how long a woman should wait before remarrying if she is divorced or widowed while her child is an infant.

The rabbis move into a conversation about the milk of humans and the milk of other animals.

Humans are not permitted to suckle from animals unless they are very ill, it is Shabbat, and there is no other way to access that 'treatment'.

In that case, suckling is an unusual way to get milk.

Eating blood is discussed as well. In contrast to breast milk, blood is not allowed to be eaten if it has left the body.

We explore the history of breastfeeding in Tanach and its poetic references in rabbinic literature and the history of human milk in antiquity.